Japanese cooking

Been trying a bit of japanese cooking
Been doing damn well too :-)

But I've noticed that vodka/white wine aren't suitable substitutes for saki...

If only I could convince my parents to buy me some saki, then my japanese cooking would be perfect! (They'd probz just think I'm an alchoholic though)

Won't get my hopes up though.

And on another topic... where the fuck can I get miso from?

Cause I looked in the shops I get all my other stuff but I couldn't find it...
Not sure if that's because they don't sell it or because I'm incompetent...

♫

Song of the moment
Utada Hikaru - Devil Inside

X-Japan

Mwahahahaha!!!

X-Japan have a UK site now!

And even though they're only talking about a Paris show... the fact that they have a UK site means that a UK tour/show may just be on the horizon :)

That make me happy x

Chances are I won't be able to afford the tickets, and even If I do I probably won't be able to get a lft up there lol. So I hope they make a dvd of it... Those last ones were all well and good but I'm hoping they make one of the Paris concert. That would be pretty damn awesome.

Big-time life decisions to make...

♥

What should I do with my hair?
I think my three ideas right now are...

I could dye it blonde (proffesionaly and expensively) and just keep on straightening as per usual. But that'll end up damaging my follicles XD.

Could just keep up my, very costly, use of red temporary dye (red... not ginger), but that just means Okaasan (<--haha) will make fun of me :'(

Or I could leave my hair alone for a while and get japanese straightening for like £160-£180. But I'll have to wait for ages, and save all my money.

Kawaii!!! ♥

So many choices...

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OMG sudden realisation?!

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I think I've finally worked out why I only ever find guys outside my area.
And why when I do find a good guy, he ups and leaves town.

I used to think it was me, but...

"Is there something wrong with you?" I would say to myself when I was all alone, and then I'd check for the hair on my palms afterwards.

Therefore proofing my crazyness...

But then, I had me a little thinkle, and came to my conclusion...




It's fucking Thurso!!!

Blame Thurso, always blame Thurso...
(I am soooo moving out when I get a chance)

♥

Ode to my firsts

最初 恋
Wish you weren't

最初接吻
Wish you weren't

"最初"
Glad you were...

最初日付
now that was akward

最初大きい恋
I wish...

精神仲間
I could be so good for you

最初愛
We all make mistakes...

♥
Loving you madly
Obsessed with your face
But I know that, sadly
You've got better taste
♥

♫

There's someone

He's not the one before, he's not the one now and he probably won't be the next one.
But he's past, present and future...


If soulmates exist I really believe he's mine.

Not that I have a chance...




Unless "Hitsuzen" has a different plan for us...

♫

L'arc-En-Ciel - Butterfly's Sleep

Eyes delicate like a young girl's, gone transparent
Pale white skin that's never been defiled
A dress which dances like a butterfly

Even if your secret wishes are never brought to fruition,
in the season when one wishes for eternity,
the lord of the dark discreetly hides his shadow crooked gears

I don't care if the world is reduced to ash
I don't care if they scramble around grabbing at everything

Your eyes will never again be graced with visions of a beauftiful dawn,
even if you tie your life up in a bundle and offer it

Please rise from the dead on earth with my last kiss

I don't care if the world is reduced to ash
I don't care if they scramble around grabbing at everything
No matter what wish is made, only sadness comes of it

Forevermore I'll quietly watch that sleeping face
until the gentle wind which tempts us to sleep surrounds me

This love will extend beyond time
I'll make it bloom before you
living endless nights and mornings
in a land where no one's hand may reach

Let the rain fall down

♫

Rain's kinda romantic...
Sometimes, when it's raining, I just like to switch the lights off and listen to the sound.

♫

Passion

♥

Passion is a powerful thing.
It's one of the most powerful emotions around.

Passion isn't just about love however, as you may believe.

"Passion (from the Latin patior, meaning to suffer or to endure) is an emotion of feeling very strongly about a person. Passion is an intense emotion compelling feeling, enthusiasm, or desire for anything. Passion often applies to an eager interest in a proposal, cause, activity or love."

That's the dictionary definition of it anyway...

Passion is a feeling of excitement, enthusiasm and compelling emotion towards a subject, idea, person, or object. Passion gives us strength and motivation, but we have to be careful.Passion is the source of our finest moments - our great loves and ecstasies - but it also has a dark side. It is the foundation for our darkest emotions; hatred, jealousy and grief.

Passion lies in all of us. Waiting, and although unbidden, it will stir. Open it's mouth and scream. It is constantly speaking to us, guiding us. It rules us all, and we obey. We haven't really got a choice in the matter...

It can cause us more pain than we can stand. If we could stop our passions we might finally have some semblance of peace in our lives. But if it wasn't in our lives we would be empty. We would walk in a hollow world, with no joy or sadness. If we had no passion, we wouldn't be alive.

♥

Fuck it

♥

Y'know what?

Fuck it.



I was too good for him anyway.

♥

♥

Relapsed.

Soooo not what I was needing...

♥

Feeling kinda stoned

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It kinda feel's strange.
I mean it's not the first time y'know?

I've been completely abandoned like this before, so you'd think I'd have gotten use to it, and be completely over it by now. And yet I am and I'm not... I feel complete apathy towards him most of the time, but then every now and again I just completely let myself get pulled in again...

And then I try to move on and I think I am.
But then I notice something...

I don't feel anything. Barely a tingle. I mean, I try so hard to feel something, but I'm barely phased. It's like nothing could possibly compare to the beautiful disaster I just went through.

If you think of it like a natural disaster, it's like being hit by a tsunami. You're completely and utterly devastated. And then you're hit by a normal-sized wave, but you barely notice because you're too busy dealing with the aftermath of what came before it.

So... is that my problem?
Am I too busy dealing with all my emotional debris?

Or am I turning into stone?

A lot of people have been telling me these past few weeks that I've become a lot more mature. So is that what growing up entails? For us to become adults to we have to lose our emotions and become harder? Because it makes sense. I mean, we feel all this emotion as teenagers, and then adults go to us and say "you're too young to understand your feelings". But is it just me or do they really mean "You're too young and have too many feelings".

Cause after all I've been through, whether I'm a drama queen or not, I really think I'm losing my emotion. I mean I've been feeling less depressed lately, which is a good thing, but at the same time, I haven't felt ecstatically happy or completely lovestruck in absolutely ages.

Maybe I'm just growing up.

♫

Cryptics help me cope

♥

It's kind of strange how you can see a person your whole life, but not really see them.
It's kind of strange how a person can see you your whole life, but you don't see them.

It's even stranger when you wan't to see a person who's seen you your whole life, but you never saw them until it was too late and they stopped looking so they couldn't see you seeing them...

Cryptics help me cope...

♥

♫

This is the end, let's begin
Take a flaw and turn it into perfection

Don't be afriad, let me in
Roll the dice on a life-changing decision

♫

Disaster Movie <-- It really was

Went to see "Disaster Movie" with my best friend on the weekend, that was one hell of an experience I can tell you. I've seen Scary Movie 1-4, Date Movie and Epic Movie - but none of them could possibly prepare me for how crap this one was.

It seemed like the entire "storyline" was simply created by linking together lots of little, mildly-amusing, jokes and spoofs of other films, and In my opinion there was very little original material.

It is therefore no surprise to me, that the films has, as of yet, only just recovered more than half of it's $25,000,000 budget (having so far had a $13,570,082 gross revenue).

The film's only high points were, in my opinion, the humorous sending up of Juno's overly-written, self-satisfying, "witty" dialogue and the mockery made of Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus, who not only tries to promote her products while dying, but also comments on the stupid children who cannot tell the difference between the two - even though all she does is wear a very cheap wig and put on a slight accent.

This, however, was definetly not enough to save the movie - and I sincerely hope that this is the last film of the "Movie" series. The first few were good, the next few were okay - but now they really are jumping the shark. It's time to let the series rest in peace - permanently.

The clouds

♥

The clouds are breathing silence
Trying to make it seem real
It's a suffocating kind of quiet
A pain you can't help but feel

The weather's slowly changing
Waking from a distant dream
It's memories rearranging
All is never as it may seem

♥

Alone

♥

Don't leave me alone
Don't make me hide away

Give me your soul
Make my heart feel safe

♥

Carpe Diem (not fish of the day)

Winners never quit
Quitters never win

The truest word you'll ever read.

If you don't try you won't fail, but if you don't try you'll never succeed.

Your choice x

♫

The way I see it you've always got to follow your heart and go for it. Can't know until you try.
If you wanna see if you can win Americal Idol, enter it.
If you want to see if that guy/girl likes you, ask them out.
If you want to be a famous actor, go for an audition.

Why don't you follow a dream today?

Why not? x

♥

I have to admit, I really don't understand guys. I mean last year, in the pre-git era (git being my new nickname for "he who must not be named") I was getting random dates from random guys left, right & centre. The relationships never lasted, but at least I was getting somewhere - even though at that time my hair made me look like a street urchin, and my fashion sense was definetly not tingling.

These days, the post-git era, I've practically mastered the black arts of hair & makeup and yet now my love-life is defineltly seeing the non-existent side of things right now...

Either way, my point is, it's been a slow year...

♥